lizzlemcguizzle: i take you to the candy shop
How to know when a women is mad...
gabrielinmybed: anonbunny: narukashi666: nbaum: lovelyxhearts: deepazure: erinjasminexo: OH MY GOD DON’T MESS WITH WOMEN. LESSON LEARNED HERE. Well this makes me scared of dating. Take heed, men. We know exactly where and how hard to hit. Damn. HOW THE FUCK COULD YOU DO THIS TO CARS?
sammyysam: Two can keep a secret, if the entire town is dead.
221bec: professionalmisandrist: What if condoms had temporary tattoos on the inside like you rolled off the condom and there was a picture of a dinosaur on your dick
bedpole: wearing cute underwear makes me hate myself a little less
dean-tacos-cas: spookapple: jackvessalius: look what we have here i have legitimately never laughed harder and for as long in my entire life
eriridan: eriridan: so i have two days of school left and my teacher decided to give us an essay, and i’ll p much be turning in this thank
h0odrich: It’s mad depressing when u eat the last piece of candy but you didn’t look at the bag and realize it was the last one so you could truly appreciate it for what it was worth
is it too late to wrap myself up like a baby and drop myself off on a billionaire’s doorstep
lavicomtesse: My grandfather got suspended from Catholic school for referring to Jesus Christ and the twelve apostles as J.C. and the Boys.
gatzzby: hannahsneakers: why don’t they have big hyped up award shows for books i mean best male/female character best antagonist best plot development best plot twist come on #book you threw across the room the hardest